The Only Self Help Tool You'll Need for the Rest of Your Life

Whether you're reading the classics or more current teachings, every self-help author has their own, unique method for society to reach it's highest potential. Some of the teaching work alongside one another. Others directly contradict. It's hard to find the middle ground to know whose system is the best. Of course, that answer depends on what works best for you and your life, but Master Life Coach Brooke Castillo found the sweet spot that works with any personal development teaching.

It's called the Model and it’s a universal tool that explains how we create things in the world. The Model is comprised of 5 parts:

Circumstances: Anything that is a fact in the world

Thoughts: a sentence in your mind

Feeling: a vibration in your body

Action: something you do

Results: the overall outcome

This system teaches that anything that has ever been created in the world has come from a Thought. How? Let me show you...

The Model begins with a Circumstance, which is an event that is always emotionally neutral. There are no good, bad, sad, or happy adjectives attached to a Circumstance because it’s just something that has happened. Emotions are applied later once you have a Thought about that Circumstance which then creates a Feeling.

To show how Circumstances are neutral here's a quick example with the same Circumstance but two different reactions because of the Thoughts behind it.

Person A:

Circumstance: Your family dog passes away (neutral)

Thought: "He was so loving and loyal, I'll miss him"

Feeling: Sadness

Person B:

Circumstance: Your family dog passes away (neutral)

Thought: That dog always bit me. I'm glad he's gone"

Feeling: Satisfaction

Yes, it's a harsh example (I'm sorry! I really do love dogs) but it shows that the emotion isn't tied to whatever Circumstance you're in, its what you Think about the Circumstance that dictates the Feeling.

The Model then says that your Feelings will determine what Actions you take next. Then those Actions will create a Result in your life. Continuing on with our previous example, here's how that would play out:

Person A:

Circumstance: Your family dog passes away (neutral)

Thought: "He was so loving and loyal, I'll miss him"

Feeling: Sadness

Action: Cry

Result: Bond with family members over the loss of a beloved pet

Person B:

Circumstance: Your family dog passes away (neutral)

Thought: "That dog always bite me, I'm glad he's gone"

Feeling: Satisfaction

Action: Hide true emotions from your grieving family

Result: Being reserved and distant from family members

Again, this one Circumstance has created two different results for Person A and B all because of the Thoughts they had about it. Your Thoughts create your reality, which means it's very important to be aware of how you are thinking about the Circumstances in your life.

So how can you utilize this universal formula in your own life? Try doing these 3 simple steps:

Do a Thought Download

A Thought Download is simply writing down the Thoughts you are thinking. Researchers say we have about 60,000 thoughts a day, so a download is like taking a small sample of your Thoughts to examine them.

The best way to do a Thought Download is to write with complete honesty about what you are thinking. Most of the time, you don't lie to yourself in your own head. You believe the thoughts you're thinking. So write as raw and honestly as possible. Be harsh, cruel, and unapologetic, no sugar coating. The more honest you are, the more effective you will be at making a change.

Run a Model on the Thoughts that need adjustment

Next, pick out prominent Thoughts that need adjusting and plug them into the Model. Fill in the Model and analyze how that current Thought is creating the Result in your life.

Once you figure out how your current thinking is manifesting in your life, then do a new Model with the Thoughts, Feelings, and Actions you need to have to create the Result you want. For example, if I was trying to start waking up at 5 am, this would be my current and future Models:

Current

C: I want to wake up at 5 am every day

T: I'm always so tired in the morning, it's too hard to change

F: Frustration

A: Hit snooze at 5 am

R: Angry at self for not following through

Future

C: I want to wake up at 5 am every day

T: How can I make getting up that early fun and easy?

F: Curiosity

A: Tests out different methods to make waking up early enjoyable

R: Finds a routine that promotes an early wake-up time

Practice the new Thought

I once heard a great piece of advice regarding personal development. It was "Talk to yourself more than you listen to yourself" Your brain is like a wild toddler that is currently trained to believe a bunch of negative thoughts about yourself. So right now, it’s not capable of generating healthy thoughts without a little conscious guidance.

So, as you start to break toxic thought patterns, tell yourself what you need to believe more than you ask yourself what you currently believe. Like, instead of complaining its too hard to get up at 5 am, tell yourself you are strong enough to do difficult things and getting up early can be fun and enjoyable. Instead of giving into the urge to eat something unhealthy, remind yourself that the urge is only temporary and you will feel proud of yourself later for choosing better options for your body.

Repetition is mastery, so practice helpful thoughts so you can create the results you want in your life.

Personally, learning the Model has taken away any confusion about which mentor's advice to follow. It may take a few tries, but once you master the Model, I promise it will change your life. Best of luck and if you have any questions, drop them below!