Let People Judge You, They're Already Doing It Anyways
Why do we care so much about other people’s opinions? It shouldn’t matter how many likes you got on a post or
So so SO many people hold themselves back from taking action because they don’t want other people to judge them. They think they’ll be laughed at if they’re seen as a beginner, their interests are too weird to be shared publicly, and they never ruffle any feathers if they just do what everyone else is doing so they play it safe.
The truth is, no matter what you’re doing, people will judge you.
Are you sharing a video you just created? Judgment.
Sharing your plan to just stay home and clean this weekend? Judgment.
Literally sitting in a corner looking at a wall for 6 hours? ..you know what I’m going to say.
Whether they’re good or bad, people’s judgments happen automatically. The judgment is a reflection of all their past experiences focus on one moment in time to have a conclusion about whether something is safe or not. Straight up biology, that’s it. So why is it seen as being so threatening?
Because of another biological phenomenon, a sense of belong. As humans, we’re meant to have community and interaction with others,. But when other’s don’t like what we do, we run the risk of being excluded, which is said to be one of the most painful human emotions. Luckily, exclusion isn’t like medieval banishing and tar and feather parades around the city anymore, but even the small, disapproval glance can shake the confidence of our security within a community.
So what can we do about this? for now, here are 2 quick tips:
1. People will always judge. It's in our nature to do so. Whether you do the greatest thing in the world or do absolutely nothing at all, people will still have an opinion. There's a saying that you can be the juiciest, sweetest peach in the world, and yet you'll still never be good enough to someone who hates peaches. That's ok. With that info, we can be proactive. Instead of worrying about what others will think, allow them to judge however they like. Just as you and I do every day. We can't control how they'll feel, so we can let them do as they please while we focus on doing the best we can with what we have.
2. People will judge, but they also really don't care. I always put it into perspective this way. Sometimes I wear the same pair of jeans 2 days in a row and worry that others will notice and think I'm weird for it. But, in reality, I wouldn't be able to tell you what any of my family members were wearing yesterday even if I'd be given a million dollars for knowing. No idea. People are too concerned about themselves to truly notice or remember something about others for a long time unless it has a strong emotional impact. Even then, maybe you'll be a hot topic around that person's dinner table for the day, but they won't remember what you did 5 years from now. Someone may say something negative, but I promise it will only be a passing thought. Just focus on doing your best and move forward from there.
Boldly, create, dream, and share. The more often you do, the more you help someone else find permission to be themselves too.
